
	January 2008 : No. 39

Welcome Angela

Taking Your Time

Some of the most satisfying, long-lasting and meaningful changes take time. We can only experience those kinds of changes when we allow time, take time, invest time, and make time, for those changes to occur properly.

“Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent.
Be careful lest you let other people spend it for you.”
[Carl Sandburg 19^th/20^th century American author, poet & historian]

“The great French Marshall Lyautey once asked his gardener to plant a tree. The gardener objected that the tree was slow growing and would not reach maturity for 100 years. The Marshall replied, 'In that case, there is no time to lose; plant it this afternoon!'”
[John F. Kennedy, 35^th President of the USA ]

[1094 words, estimated reading time 6-9 mins]

It’s an odd thing, time. None of us quite know how much we have at any given moment, but if we’re aware, we at least know we have some left! We can spend it wisely, invest it or waste it and if we take care of ourselves, we may even gain more of it. The one thing we can’t do is stop it or get it back once it’s gone.

So we tend to be impatient and, as we progress and technology advances, we’ve become even more so.

We now live in an ‘instant’ world – instant money just a phone-call away, have-now-pay-later purchases, overnight stars, 60-minute make-overs – all to satisfy an “I want it RIGHT NOW!!!” mentality that is, unfortunately, becoming more and more prevalent. When we’re lonely, we want instant contact, when we’re hungry we want instant food, when we’ve got a problem we want an instant fix.

However, let’s take a step back and think about some things that fly in the face of all this immediacy…

Good wine, for example, takes years to mature and the initial growth, selection, harvesting, pulping etc. is a tiny part of the waiting for that perfect moment to uncork the bottle and enjoy.

Great coffee, in my opinion, does not come from granules in a jar (although some would disagree); it comes from roasted, ground beans that hot water or steam is percolated through, taking minutes, not seconds, for the flavour to develop.

It’s the same with many things – good furniture, great paintings, hearty food, lasting relationships, deep trust; all these things require the passage of that most precious resource, time.

Speed often comes with an associated cost of one sort or another.

For example, fast food may be cheap but is rarely as nutritional or as truly tasty as a well-considered meal. Surgery to go up a cup size or down a dress size or two costs a chunk of cash and a lot of discomfort and pain, and the risk of complications. “Instant credit” comes with interest, often at quite high rates, so you can spend longer paying for that item that it would’ve taken to save for it.

Even those 60-minute make-overs that seem to transform a room or home in a single hour hide a huge amount of time spent in planning and preparation, a team of up to 50 people and an acceptance of cut corners and lesser quality into the process.

What I’m really hoping you’ll get from this perhaps slightly rambling article this month, is that although rapid change does definitely take place – I’ve had plenty of clients make huge changes to beliefs, behaviours and occasionally even personality, sometimes in a matter of hours or even minutes – some change requires time and happens slowly, gradually, bit by bit, step by step, sometimes imperceptibly so, but it happens.

It is January and, as most of us are aware, the traditional time for assessing how life was last year and deciding to make some changes this year. Perhaps things to start doing, things to take up again, tasks that we’ve put off, or even things to stop doing and let go of too.

One of the things I personally have decided to do is that, in April 2009, I will run the London Marathon with a friend of mine (yes, you know who you are and I’m not going to let you forget!!).

It will be quite an achievement for me since I’ve never run more than about 6 miles in one go, and there’s no way I could ever expect to go from my current level of fitness to being able to run 26-and-a-bit miles by tomorrow; that kind of change definitely will take time and commitment, some support and encouragement from my family and friends, and perhaps even some sacrificing of time spent with me from them too (unless they come training with me of course…)

With the right advice and wisdom from those more experienced or knowledgeable than I am, I do know I’ll be able to get fitter (and perhaps a little faster too) more efficiently than if I decided to try to do the whole thing myself, but it will nevertheless take time.

I know that some of you reading this have made changes that have taken time to make, or to see the effects of. Some of you made smaller changes a few years ago that are still rippling in positive ways even now, touching more and more areas of life.

Some of you may even be wishing, wanting to make changes but secretly hoping they’ll happen without waiting, perhaps even without too much effort, and to you all I can do is to ask you “How much do you really want that change?” Because if it’s that important to you, you’ll do whatever is required, take whatever time is needed, to make it happen.

For the curious, the daring, and the committed, here’s this month’s personal challenge:

1. List your “New Year’s Resolutions” or other goals you might have set yourself in the last few months.

2. Take a good look at each one in turn and decide whether it’s:

a. something you’re really serious about and definitely want to carry through

b. something you said or wrote because you thought you ought to or because you’re trying to support someone else

3. For each one in category ‘b’, decide now whether you’re committed enough to it to put it into category ‘a’ and, if not, cross it off your list.

4. For each goal you still have left, now do this:

a. write down all the reasons WHY you want to do it.

b. write down the EVIDENCE you’ll need to know you’re on track and, finally, how you’ll know you’ve achieved it, i.e. what you’ll need to be doing, seeing, feeling, hearing, saying to yourself.

c. work out how much TIME you’ll need to commit to this goal, being honest and realistic, to stay on track and achieve it.

5. Now go back over that list and decide again whether, in the light of your reasons, evidence and especially your time, you are still committed to it. Cross off your list those you still aren’t totally committed to, so that all you’re left with are those things that you are now honestly promising yourself you’ll do and will continue to do until they’re finished.

Even if you’re only left with one goal, that’s GREAT – it’s far better to commit to changing one thing and doing it well.

Remember, give yourself time and don’t stand still, because every minute gone is a minute less of the life you want!

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